Following a parenting plan during and after a divorce or separation can be difficult for some. A parenting agreement or Orders have been made by the Court. Now what do we do, you may ask yourself? So have the conflicts with the other parents regarding the children stopped because we now have Orders or a parenting plan? Probably not…
If you are still experiencing difficulties with the other parent, then maybe a parenting coordinator can help.
What is a parenting coordinator?
Parenting Coordination (“PC”) is a child centered process for conflicted, separated and separating parents. It is a form of dispute resolution and child development education for parents, to help them implement their Parenting Orders or Parenting Plan.
Conflict does not stop once parenting Orders have been made or agreement has been reached. Often that’s when the really hard work of daily routines and working together begin and the uncertainties about the Orders can appear.
Through education and case management, the family’s progress, post-separation, is monitored to assist the parents to ensure the best possible outcomes for their children.
When to engage a Parenting Coordinator?
Parents whose disputes involve high levels of anger, protracted or repetitive litigation or who struggle to comply with Court Orders or Parenting Plan may benefit from the appointment of a PC.
A PC might assist where parents have shown a continued inability or unwillingness to make cooperative parenting decisions, to comply with parenting arrangements or Orders and to reduce child-related conflicts.
There are regular sessions with the PC; through education, ongoing dispute resolution and case management, the family’s progress, post- separation, is monitored to assist the parents to ensure the best possible outcomes for their children. Offering them the opportunity to grow in home environments free from the devastating stress of being caught in the middle of parental conflict.
How does it work?
Parents voluntarily engage with, or can be ordered to work with a PC for a given period. PC’s work with the parents as and when the issues arise. This may be ad hoc and outside of normal appointment times. The benefit to the family is that the issues are addressed immediately as they occur.
The process usually works as follows:
• The parents and the PC sign an Agreement noting the terms of the engagement, the process and the expectations of the engagement.
• The parents each have an individual session in the first instance. These are followed by joint sessions which include both of the parents and the PC. If there are safety concerns the “joint sessions” will be done so that parties don’t come into contact with each other.
• Parents continue to attend sessions, usually on a monthly basis, until the PC advises that the matter can move to an “as needed” basis.
• In addition, the session attendance, either parent can contact the PC with a concern or difficulty and the PC will communicate with the other parent about these issues in an attempt to reach timely resolution.
• The PC will educate the parents on how to begin to manage this process themselves so that eventually the parents can disengage the PC and manage their co-parenting themselves.
• The parents will usually share equally in the cost of all communications with the PC.
What are the goals?
Parents that engage in parenting coordination achieve the following:
• Reduce Child Stress;
• Improve Co-Parent Relationship;
• Increase Parenting Cooperation and Respect;
• Reduce Future Litigation; and
• Monitor parental behaviour and compliance Referrals.
PC Benefits Children by:
• Enhancing the child’s confidence and self- esteem by creating an optimal environment for growth.
• Reducing the child’s symptoms of stress as parental conflict decreases.
• Diminishing the child’s sense of loyalty binds.
• Increasing the likelihood of keeping two active parents in the child’s life.
• Creating a more relaxed home atmosphere allowing the child to adjust more effectively.